I want to experience all of the beautiful things this world and it’s people have to offer. I want to exchange stories with strangers in different lands who live completely different lives than anything I could ever imagine. I want to hear their stories of love and loss, of suffering and joy. I want to hear about their conversations with God. I want to be filled with their memories, hopes and dreams. I want to know the history of their land and their people. I want to see the pain in their eyes, the happiness in their smiles, feel the peace in their hearts. I want to cry and laugh with them. I want to fight for their causes. I want to be captivated by the beauty of their soul, I want to fall in love with their cities. I want to swim in their rivers, explore their religions, play with their children. I want to dance in their streets and walk along their beaches. I want to watch their sunsets and make love under their stars.
I feel as if I already love every one of them and the places they live. Now I just want to know them, see them. To understand and experience them.
I want to experience all of this over and over again with an open heart, full of compassion, trust and understanding.
Do you ever feel like you were meant for something more?
I don’t mean a subtle feeling. I mean a desire so strong that you feel it in your soul. A feeling that never really goes away.
I have had that feeling for as long as I can remember.
I can’t say whether this is good or bad. Haven’t figured that out yet. It’s not that I’m never happy with what I have, because I am.
I have always just felt that I needed something more, deeper.
So I’ve been trying to figure out what my needs, desires and wants really are.
What I do know-
I need to experience everything.
I need to create new things.
I need to experience a deeper love than I’ve ever know or ever dreamed of.
I need to eliminate all negative thoughts.
I need to be understood by someone other than myself.
I need to be able to treat everyone with love no matter how they treat me.
I need to see the world. All of it.
I need to be able to be vulnerable. To be open to rejection and pain.
I need to face my fears and accept failure.
I need to know that I tried my best and gave it my all.
I was told recently that I want too much and I am impossible to please.
I don’t think that’s possible. They are my wants, not yours or anybody else’s. I feel like my wants are simple yet others see them as complicated.
Maybe they are complicated. Maybe I am unreasonable.
But I know that I will accomplish all of this and so much more.
I have no doubt.